For the past several months, I’ve been working with a guy who “reconsolidates memories.” He explained to me that over the course of our lives our experiences become memories with emotion attached. Some emotions feel good and some don’t.
Because of these experiences (turned memories), you and I come to accept a set of beliefs. Some beliefs are freeing, and some beliefs are limiting.
Our brains work like computers. When we wake up every morning, our brain turns on and runs the code it’s been programmed to run. If a past experience coded the message, “I’m not good enough,” then the limiting belief affects our present emotions and decisions.
“It’s not like you wake up and want to live out every limiting belief you have,” he said, “our brains do what they’re supposed to do.”
Thankfully, also like a computer, the brain can be recoded.
Through accessing specific memories, emotions, and certain brain waves, it’s possible to shift a limiting belief. I’ll share an example of my own.
For many years I have felt, and been afraid of, insignificance. My life and work don’t matter. My words and contributions don’t make a difference. Because of these limiting beliefs, I have found myself guarded in some situations and self-preserving in others. Because of this behavior, the thing I feared – not being heard or making a difference – was indeed happening. By not freely speaking up, I made myself insignificant. In other words, I was creating what I feared for myself (insignificance) all while self-preserving so someone else wouldn’t give me evidence it was true.
Obviously this wasn’t serving me.
What I want is for my life to matter. I want to make a difference. And I want to feel at peace and relaxed in all situations while doing so.
By accessing a couple of memories that instantly gave evidence into the limiting belief of insignificance, I “relived” them with the belief “I matter. I make a difference. I am at peace and relaxed.” I reconsolidated (or made stronger) the memory that was unconsciously taking away from the present.
Over four sessions, I’ve experienced more strength, relief, and assuredness. After 40 years of coded belief, I’m not sure the four hours I’ve worked are going to “fix everything,” but I’ve increased my belief in the ability to help one another live as freely as possible.
And I believe in coaching.
The type of coaching I do is not about the past. I focus on the present and what can be done right now to move forward. I leave digging into the past for therapists. The experience with Tom from BioAlignment, however, has provided even more evidence into in changing the belief and sequential emotion attached to past experiences that create beliefs that stifle our present moments.
It’s similar work with different approaches: We prune old rotten vines to allow energy for new fruit to grow.
If you haven’t taken a step toward pruning what isn’t working for you, I highly suggest it. I don’t suggest it as a way to draw new business; I’ll introduce you to Tom. My desire is to see more communities with conscious, free, intentional and loving people.
I don’t believe there’s anything limiting about that.
Rachel is a certified coach & advocate of growth. Learn more here.
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