According to Michael Bungay Stanier in his book The Coaching Habit: Say Less, Ask More & Change the Way You Lead Forever, there are three reasons why developing your coaching habit didn’t stick.
First, maybe the training didn’t engage you.
You felt bored, over or under stimulated, or didn’t see it meshing with the reality of your busy work life.
Second, maybe the training was engaging, but…
So you were inspired to cultivate coaching in your day-to-day conversations, but…when you got back to the grind, it was just easier to go back to your old habits and ways of quick-fix managing.
The third reason is actually the most compelling to me.
The simple behavior change of giving less advice and asking more questions is just difficult!
You’ve likely been conditioned to fix problems and give out solutions. Plus, if you ask too many questions, it feels like you’re losing control of the conversation.
And according to Stanier, you have.
“It’s call empowerment,” he says.
If you know the benefits of what real coaching can do, stick with it.
These types of conversations aren’t just for work – they’re for your own children and grandchildren, spouses, and friends!
Start with one small change and keep moving forward. Effective coaching is proven to unlock the potential of those around you optimizing its use, and creating a culture of problem-solving, empowered, innovative, confident people!
Want to brush up on your skills and create an effective habit in conversation? Check out Bungay-Stanier’s book…and contact us!
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