I’ve been working with people who feel guarded. They don’t want to let down their walls because it feels too vulnerable, and let’s face it, it’s a given that most of us like protection from rejection and discomfort.
But I wonder, what is the cost?
Recently I accompanied my colleague to provide training to an organization of about 40. In the five years I’ve been part of our team, I haven’t been in the front of a room. I’m quite comfortable at the back of the room, behind my computer writing, or coaching one-on-one.
During the training, employees participate in an activity in which they fill in the blank, “I’m not (blank) enough,” and write it on a card. They come face-to-face with a limiting belief. (more…)
Sometimes I get emails with great questions! I thought I’d share a recent one.
(Side note: We teach 7 Levels of Energy Leadership. It’s a way for organizations to have containers and common language for what they’re experiencing as individuals and as a culture. Using “level 2, 5, and 6” in the following email exchange is a reference to those 7 Levels).
How do you get to that level (6?) of win-win? Meaning how do you not feel jealous or upset when others are succeeding?
I hired someone to clean my house. Other than scheduling regular massages, this is the second best thing I’ve done for myself in the last three months.
Shame set up camp as the message that “I should be able keep up with everything and if I can’t, I’m somehow less of a mother, wife, or woman” condemned me.
And then it reared up again when I sought out help.
And now I’m OVER it!!!
Coming home to clean floors, smudge-free glass, and sparkly bathroom fixtures fills me with gratitude and peace! And I love paying another mom—who has a better knack at deep cleaning than me—to do it!
If you haven’t given yourself permission, it’s ok to build things into your life that help you, and that create happiness. It’s not selfish. You are not inept. It doesn’t make you less of a mom, wife, or person!
My only regret? That I didn’t do this sooner.
Reflect: What’s one of the best things you’ve done for yourself? What keeps you from doing more?
Rachel is a Certified Professional Coach with a Masters Degree in Counseling. She coaches professionals through important decisions and relationships so their minds are clear to move forward in life and in business.