Our brains are designed to self-preserve. When commuting down a busy highway and a semi-truck pulls into our lane, we don’t have time to consider, “OK, I’m going to either slam on my brakes or swerve here…which would be most appropriate?” Our brains automatically make the decision and put our bodies into action. Thank goodness!
In a life-threatening situation, we want our limbic system to kick in, to “save me”!
However, the hang-up of this perfectly designed process shows up in situations or relationships that are not necessarily life-threatening––when adrenaline pours into the body similar to the semi-truck experience, creating stress without resolution over long periods of time. (more…)
When asked how he carved his infamous statue of David, Michelangelo replied, “I just chipped away what wasn’t David.”
In the business of personal coaching, group coaching, and culture audits, our goal is similar: to help individuals and groups chip away what gets in the way of inherent possibility.
“There was time before you felt (insert limiting belief here),” I tell clients. “The You from that time is still inside.”
Then we proceed with the process of chipping marble–of chipping thinking, feeling, and doing. (more…)
I’m experiencing a pervasive inadequacy. This was the second line I wrote in an SOS email to a friend.
Are professionals supposed to confess stuff like this on a public blog? It’s risky, my ego tells me, but I feel I’m also risking something more dangerous if I don’t–a belief that when looking at the life of someone else, it always appears good, or at the very least, somehow better than yours. (more…)
Because I coach virtually from home, I hang a sign outside my office door to inform my family what time I’ll be out of a call. If it’s an emergency, they know to come in.
Recently, during a debrief with a new client, about 40 minutes into the call my son had an emergency. (more…)
For the past several months, I’ve been working with a guy who “reconsolidates memories.” He explained to me that over the course of our lives our experiences become memories with emotion attached. Some emotions feel good and some don’t.
Because of these experiences (turned memories), you and I come to accept a set of beliefs. Some beliefs are freeing, and some beliefs are limiting. (more…)
“Because, Rachel, we’ve always done it this way.” This was the response I received recently after asking why an organization wouldn’t consider a new useful and efficient idea.
“If we let one person do it, then we’d have to let everyone do it.”
This rebuttal created instant relief in my mind: Awesome! If everyone was allowed to do this, they would save so much time!
But the door was shut and dead-bolted on the idea, and the-way-we-always-do-things prevailed.
At first I experienced frustration (a win-win isn’t going to be considered), then sadness (you’re pushing the envelope again, Rach, and not making any friends), then an insight (omg! This has been happening your whole life!).
I began to wonder how many square pegs, like me, have been trying to fit into round holes. (more…)
Humanity takes stiff-legged wobbly steps in the form of fleshy bodies and falls, scrapes its knees, gets back up, and keeps exploring.
Nobody has life figured out.
The most influential leaders in history were closest as they pointed in the direction of love, compassion and forgiveness and opened the eyes of humanity to the dignity of one other.
But as soon as they draw us closer together, we pull ourselves apart. (more…)
I haven’t felt inspired in a few weeks. Very little has moved me to greater effort, enthusiasm or creativity. A particular feeling hasn’t been awakened thats led to productive insight lately. Things have felt…ordinary.
So I didn’t write.
A subtle pressure slowly began building to produce meaningful and profound output. I didn’t feel on the cusp of any wow-factor material, and I didn’t want to sound like everybody else.
So I didn’t write. (more…)