5 Ways Marriage can Affect all Your Relationships

This month marks 13 years of marriage for my husband and me. Oh, and I think it’s important to point out we’re not soul mates.

My mom told me once “the one” was not out there somewhere. “There are lots of people we’re compatible with, and we get to decide which one we want to spend the rest of our life with,” she said.

Her short quip grounded me that searching for someone outside myself to share a you-complete-me-Jerry-McGuire-moment would just keep me looking for my other half.

And I want to be whole. (more…)

How to Strengthen Your Marriage, Your Family & Yourself

Driving home one evening from an afternoon of swimming and barbecuing with friends, I turned to look in the backseat at my tanned-skinned tuckered-out kids, and with a full heart told my husband, “Summer is what life is all about.”

Growing up surrounded my educators, summer was lathered with reasons to be happy. No schedules. No alarm clocks. No rushing. No shoes? No problem.

Summer completes me. Summer makes me happy.

Summer was once what I lived for until… (more…)

4 Steps to Reconcile a Strained Relationship

No matter whom I’ve coached, there is always one constant: at some point we talk about a relationship.

This makes sense – we’re wired for connection. So when a connection feels strained with a colleague, spouse, child, parent, or friend, it can hold our attention hostage, leaving less space to engage elsewhere.

When you find yourself a part of strained relationship, consider four steps to reconnect and repair it going forward: (more…)

How does Conditioned Communication affect your Relationships?

seal-326159_960_720 “You’d have popular hair in the 80s.”

These seven words were an instant trigger when my husband said them after I’d let my hair go all nat-u-ral one morning.

For 30 years I’ve fought my naturally curly hair with straightening shampoos, gobs of hair product, and a flat iron. To say the least, I prefer anti big hair.

“That was a back-handed thing to say,” I said.

Naturally I was talking out of 30 years of non-acceptance for my DNA, and at the same time he was talking out of 30 years of speaking with metaphor rather than just saying what he really meant. (more…)