What if “Adverse Childhood Experience” doesn’t fit?

Schools have been actively engaging in the conversation about the effects of trauma in childhood, and now Oprah is informing the nation. Awareness is rising. I’m thankful.

However, the thought that keeps creeping in my mind over the past couple of months has been what about the people who don’t meet the ACEs (Adverse Childhood Experience) criteria but still feel depressed or anxious?

What happened to them? If a childhood was “normal” and needs were easily met, why are they hurting? (more…)

Why your emotional Facebook posts are hurting you

images-2We can’t tell each other how to feel. It doesn’t work. It’s never worked. In fact, saying, “don’t feel that way” feels about as equally as harsh as a slap in the face.

Emotions feel legit.

But when your brain has been hijacked by the amygdala – a small center in your limbic system in charge of emotion – it’s time to get smart. When that tiny almond sized part of the brain is in control, energetic intelligence is no longer present.

You can recognize when energetic intelligence is lacking by knee-jerk reactions, feeling out-of-the-mind fury, or responding out of highly-charged emotion rather than logic.

Maybe you’ve seen a few of these posts on social media? Maybe you’ve posted some yourself… (more…)

Three Ways to Reduce Holiday Funk

laughterIf the holidays induce stress and you secretly look forward to December 26, you’re not alone.

When stress noticeably surfaces (often accompanied by guilt, anger or self-pity) taking an intentionally different approach is essential. When meditation, prayer or long walks by the beach just aren’t “doing it” for you, consider these practical approaches:

  1. Get out of Your Head.

Most of us think our circumstances are contributing to “funk”, but really it’s our thoughts about those circumstances. One crappy thought leads to another crappy thought and before you know it, your head is full of it, and the funk is looming. (more…)